Life is full of pitfalls. We have all lost something or someone. It’s how we deal with those pitfalls and losses that defines us and allows us to grow.
But what if we are stuck, and still mired in those pitfalls and losses?
Anneli Rufus 2008 book, Stuck: Why We Can’t Or Won’t Move Forward talks about the many reason that some of us are stuck. We may have developed bad habits over a lifetime. We know we want to move forward in lives and in our jobs, but something keeps us from moving forward. Or we may have experienced a traumatic event that shook up our world and scared the sh*t out of us.
Exploring the vast number of reasons that we get stuck, Ms. Rufus breaks these reasons down in a way that is both articulate and down to earth. Our reasons for remaining stuck may be fear, denial or even an ingrained idea that our culture has taught us that doesn’t somehow feel right. One of the things that caught me off guard was that most of the interviewees were raised in families who ranked in the higher levels of socio-economic rank in America. Ms. Rufus herself admitted that she was raised in a middle class home with two educated, intelligent, loving parents.
If it is true that the interviewees represent those of us who are fortunate to be raised in a good home with good parents, then why are we stuck? Is it the culture that emphasizes material wealth over everything else? Are we so bored with our middle class lives that we have to create emotional trauma to feel anything? Or are we just ungrateful for what we have?
I don’t have the answers to those questions, but I do know that this book is good and I recommend it.